Stop for a moment and remember the best quality time(s) you had with a parent when you were growing up. What were you doing together?
Asking myself the same question, here’s what first came to mind…
The most frequent quality times were in the car when I was one on one in that little “room” with a parent. I remember this more so with my father when I’d go with him for a drive in the country to visit a friend of his. We didn’t have a radio in the car in those days, so we got to talk.
With my mother it was often during times that I asked questions about faith, or when I was getting close to a music exam and needed extra help. I recall the time she patiently helped me learn how to write the letters of the Greek alphabet. I also remember the birthday when she gave me a beautifully made cane sewing basket that I know took some of her precious time to make.
Of course, this also leads me to wonder what my own children would say about their times with me in their growing years…
Life can become so busy when our children are little and they really have no idea how stretched we as parents can become. All they know is when we are there for them, with no excuses. Now I’m feeling guilty! One thing I’m really grateful for now, though, is that as young adults leading their own lives they still (mysteriously) seem to like times of hanging out with us! That’s a real delight.
Recently I had a pupil come to her piano lesson and she played her new piece beautifully. There had been some recent struggles with motivation to practice, and progress had been slow. So what was the difference? Her mother had sat with her and played the treble or bass part while she practiced the other hand’s part, before putting both together by herself. Both mother and daughter were really happy with the outcome and it did something special—not just for the music progress, but for their relationship to each other.
So, seeing as you are probably busy, I just wanted to leave you with one thing to ponder.
What is one thing (it doesn’t have to be music related just because this is a music blog) you can do now, especially if you are a parent with young children, to make sure your children want to hang out with you when they grow up?
Fraser says:
What a great blog mum! Wishing, all the way from Lebanon, I could hang with you now.
Delwyn McKenzie says:
Hi Fraser,
Thanks so much son, what a lovely thing to say. Feeling very blessed. Enjoy Lebanon, looking forward to your safe return.
Chuana says:
This is such a good reminder and feels timely. I think the one thing I can do, even though due to work, my time with my daughter is getting increasingly limited, to be intentionally present with her in the time we do have. To play with and talk to her and give her the full attention she wants. Last week I took a day off and took her swimming. It was a really special bonding time 🙂 I know in my life how much it’s meant to me when my parents have taken an interest my interests and given me their undivided time!
Delwyn McKenzie says:
Really appreciate your perspective as a young parent to this Chuana and very grateful if my musings can give some help along the way.